The Emotional Rollercoaster ran out of gas and I'm stuck at the top with no way down...
I'm waiting.
I'm waiting to see why God made June come at all this year. In my mind he could have wiped out the month and it really would have been just fine. But for now, I'm waiting.
My family has been through some massively BAD things happening to us. Between my wonderful stepfather (Mark) having to up his meds for his MS (Multiple Sclerosis) because of the pain, my mom getting fired for being an honest employee, my sister lying and telling her boyfriend that Mark was rapping her (anyone who knows Mark understands why it's a blatant lie), and a whole heap of other problems... I'm still waiting. I'm trying to praise Abba... really I am! I'm just waiting for a reason to do so... I'm looking and I keep hoping... and years down the road I'll see and go 'heh, that's what all of this was for!' But right now it's not so noticeable. If you pray, my family could really use a couple...
I wrote a poem today.... it's not bad.... I guess...
Thank you Lord
I'm not sure yet what for
The hurt is a constant stab
Why does it have to hurt so bad?
I can't think of why to Praise You
But I know that's what I must do
So Thank You
Thank you
Thank you, Lord, thank you.
Uh huh.... yeah... anyone with ideas are welcome...
posted by Fitz @ 4:56 PM
4 comments
4 Comments:
*Huggies Amber* I really hope you do figure out what June was for. Your blog reminded me of something. Obie's mom passed away this week, and the funeral is on Friday. Could you pray for him and his family? I talked to him last night on MSN and he's OK because he's still in shock but it's going to be really hard.
Al
Amber dear, i didnt know that your mom had lost her job, but then again i havent seen/talked to you since Saturday...Well we need to hang out sometime soon, but i am betting you went home or to watertown since i am assuming you dont work since you worked last weekend... Well in case i dont see you have a good 4th and feel free to call me at any time, HINT HINT, hehe!!!
Oh, poor Obie! I would be devastated if my mother died! Forget losing her job! oh dear...I'll definitely pray for him! And you're right Tamminator, I did go southward for the festivities, but I might be back up on the 5th...so it's not a very long drop out of existence!
wow.... *HUG* ...... *HUG*
which sister? can you slap her for me?
and since when does honesty reduce job security?
good grief... what a month.... but it sounds like you're hangin' in there. Keep on keeping you heart in the right place!
I like your poem. it makes me think of a BarlowGirl song.
"I waited for you today,
but you didn't show.
I needed you today;
so where did you go?
You told me to call,
said You'd be there
and though I haven't seen you..
are You still there?
I cry out with no reply
and I can't feel you by my side,
so I hold tight to what I know:
You're here,
and I'm never alone
And though I cannot see you
and I can't explain why;
such a deep reassurance
You've placed in my life.
We cannot separate,
'cause you're part of me
and though You're invisible
I'll trust the unseen
I cry out with no reply
and I can't feel you by my side,
so I hold tight to what I know:
You're here,
and I'm never alone
Keep holding tight.
I'll keep praying for you
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